In the cause of building relationships or marriages, some have failed to realise the need in building their lives and that’s because the relationships/marriages seems perfect and easy going from the onset, but regardless of how perfect it seems ab-initio, some relationships/marriages collapses in the latter.
Being caught in the Web of not building a live as a result of perfect relationship or marriage that later failed and left one stranded, mostly in a case where one was always dependent on one’s partner, raises my thoughts on the need of building a life, same time one is building a relationship.
So even if the relationship fails in the latter, one’s life doesn’t have to fail or end. Capping it all, finding yourself in a relationship where you always receive a hand-up or a hand-out, don’t just relent on those hand-outs and hand-up’s as a means of livelihood, rather see them as tools that can enable you build your own life, so as to be able to stand on your feet especially when the relationship or marriage fails as they often do.
Your life is your personal property as you have the sole ownership of it without sharing it with anyone, your relationship or marriage is a joint venture between you and your partner.
When a situation involves an individual property, hardly would the owner abandon it without making amends or reconstruction. That is to say, one can never abandon one’s life, rather one would go the extra mile in building one’s life so as to see to the best or betterment of it.
But talking about relationship or marriage, where two individuals are involved and thus becomes the owner of it. Means two individuals are sharing or owns the property (joint venture). One something often goes wrong in the property, one might tend to abandon it or take a long walk.
As the other partner might want to rebuild or see to the betterment of it, but being a joint venture one can’t rebuild it alone, because it involves a second person, which is one’s partner that have decided to abandon it and take a long walk.
Finding oneself in a situation where the welfare of the relationship or marriage, solely relies on the shoulders of the one that have decided to abandon the ill relationship or marriage and take a long walk, what will be the fate of the dependent partner?
Most of the people that are dependent on their partners for livelihood, are often the ones that are mostly committed to seeing to the success of the relationship or marriage. Such relationship or marriage, consists of a benefactor and a beneficiary.
Benefactor; as the one that supports the relationship or marriage, financially and seeing to the welfare of it, and manages it economically.
Beneficiary; as the dependent partner, that totally depends his or her livelihood on what the banefactor has to offer, though he or she might be supporting the relationship or marriage, romantically or sexually.
The above illustration can be found in a relationship or marriage where one partner has nothing to bring to the table financially, and the other partner has to support the relationship or marriage financially.
The beneficiary in return might tend to see to the success of the relationship/marriage because he or she is totally depending on it for livelihood. Some might become peacemaker, they will never get angry at anything thrown at them by the benefactor.
While some might tend to support the affair with great romance and sex. But, romance and sex can’t be substantial when the shoulder that bears the expenditure keeps weighing down.
At that point the benefactor is beginning to lose interest, the only thing that would salvage such affair, is for the both partners to be creative in bringing something sustainable to the table order than romance or sex.
But when separation becomes unavoidable, that the benefactor has to abandon the affair and walk away. The life of the beneficiary might become complicated most especially when one never saved for a rainy day.
Finding yourself in such affair that you are a beneficiary, starting early enough to make plans that will sustain you there, is absolutely the needful that should be done prior to such incident where the benefactor is already walking away.
So it’s either one saves for the rainy days, or one builds a life when the act of favour is still in action.